Family Councils

This seems like a good time to introduce you to something we've been doing for over a year now.

Each Sunday we hold "Flight Plan" (I may never get back to "7 Habits of Highly Effective Families", but after a year, I can honestly say I've really used chapter one).  It's our time to calendar, go over individual family members needs, make a family goal and have a lesson (flight plan also doubles as Family Home Evening... not ideal, but hey, at least we've had a lesson, weekly, for the past year).  Our family goals range from easy to hard... from being more positive, to not complaining about chores, to more reverent prayers.  For each goal we come up with specific criteria - so it's easy to know if we reach our goal.  For example, when trying to be "more positive" we decided that meant everyone sharing five "good things" about their day at family prayer each night.  The following week we decide as a family how we did.  The kids are always very perceptive, understanding by themselves how well we did.  If we completed our goal, we get our reward - something we chose as a family, a fun activity, a treat, etc.  And if we didn't make it... usually we just carry it over another week (and another, and another until we do...).  Sunday we finally met our kindness chain goal.  We were working on being kinder to each other and mom set the lofty goal of reaching a chain (recording yours or someone else in the family's acts of kindness) 100 links long.  After several weeks working on it, I had called this "the final week."  You should have seen these three frantically doing nice things for each other when I called time for flight plan and they knew we were still a few short.  There was a lot of hugging going on.  The links were a joy for me to read:  "W held my stuff while I buckled up"  "I shared my spirit with Monkey"  "Mom made muffins"...

This week we're working on getting chores done before lunch (it being Spring Break) and singing "Today while the sun shines" from the hymn book with family prayer and scriptures (I added a song that ties into our goal as part of the whole goal thing a few weeks ago and although there is the occasional teenaged grumpy, it is wonderful to have my family gathered around the piano to sing every night.)  - working towards a Star Trek TOS movie marathon on Saturday.

Elder Ballard gave a great talk about family councils during General Conference.  As I listened, it made me happy to know we're already doing something along those lines... and I can add my testimony to that of Elder Ballard's - holding family council hasn't made my family perfect or solved all our problems, but it has made many things easier.  From mundane who-drives-who-where, to deeper relationships. And letting the kids each have time share things - hopes, plans, worries, struggles - with the family IS helping... as we hear one child pray for another needs in family prayer without being asked or reminded.  Just hearing that has made the past year's efforts worth it.



(and if you're wondering about Monkey's absence in these pics... she's off enjoying Spring Break with a friend and her family)